I liked it Trea, but I have some questions.
1. What is Lansing's motivation? Is Tempus powerful beyond the project and are they coming after him? Have they perhaps framed him as a dangerous fugitive, so he can never return to Earth? (That's a suggestion, by the way!
In Damon Dark, I had the idea that the Maddox Corporation was funding Tempus, so they'd be out for Lansing!)
2. Why does he want to explore the unknown in space? Is he just a scientist driven by the quest for knowledge and his curiosity? If so...say so! We need to know what drives this guy!
3. Is there an enemy out there? At the moment it seems Vincent is getting into some hijinks saving the ass of a guy who's fled a moderate danger before the story started and is now happily tinkering with an old rocket. The plot is like "I'm fine now...and I've found a hobby...restoring rockets...can you please steal some batteries for my hobby?" and VK replies "Sure, it'll be a lark" and goes have some fun with a muppet.
I think it needs an injection of "threat" and "motivation".
1.) Lansing wants to escape out of survival needs because Tempus/Maddox are out to hunt him down like an animal and drag his ass to the torture room and learn what he knows.
2. He is hungry to escape Earth as it's his only way out and he is driven by genuine thirst for knowledge.
3. There's a nasty alien menace out there, threatening the galaxy, and he and his ship can help stop them.
The production was really good and I liked all contributions by Trea, Chris and Jack!